This lesson is available to enjoy in either audio or written format (below).

Lesson One - Reflecting on 2020

In 2020, we felt lost as the world we once knew came to a halt. Yet, in the stillness, we are finding ourselves.

As we sustain major loss, navigate the uncertainty, and tune into the beat of our hearts, our very DNA is changing.

2020 is forever in our bones, in the soil, in the air.

We don’t know how its ripples will impact our lives--or the world--because we aren’t through it yet. Its consequences are still unknown, and a lot of the lessons are still mysteries to us. And yet, we are different than we were one year ago.

Because of what we have lost and found in 2020, we know now what matters to us and what doesn’t. This is buried treasure. It’s vital, once-in-a-lifetime information that needs to be unearthed. It needs to be named. It needs our attention.

And in 10 years, we will wish we had written it all down.

Life is rushing past us--December is moving like a freight train--but the transition to a new year offers a natural invitation to pause and take care of yourself. By saying “yes” to this retreat, you have accepted this invitation.

I’m so delighted you are here for Lost and Found: a self-guided retreat to honor and process 2020.

In this self-paced retreat, I will guide you gently into the pause that this new year is offering. We’ll go through an unravelling process to review and honor what we’ve been through this year. I will ask thoughtful questions to help uncover the buried treasure. And most of all, we will make space for all the complexities: allowing time to feel confused, to celebrate, to grieve, and to lovingly turn the page.

In this--the first part of this retreat--we will review the past year, discuss the importance of conscious reflection, and take stock of who we are now.

In the second part of this retreat, we will honor what we have lost as individuals and a collective, and talk about grief and finding meaning.

In the third part of this retreat, we will make space for all the ways we feel lost. We will remember that we are in transition and recovery, and gently reframe feeling stuck as being in the process of becoming something new.

In the fourth part of this retreat, we will discover what we have found this year within ourselves and how we have grown. We will anchor into who we are now--what dreams are surfacing and what is ready to be released.

And in the fifth part of this retreat, we will talk about ritualizing the end of this year. We will mark the endings in our life with both celebrations and burials, and move forward feeling freer and more at peace.

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Let’s start by considering where we are at the end of 2020.

We are grieving that our world will never be the same. We have suffered devastating external losses this year--the massive loss of life, jobs, health, homes, social lives, routines, and plans. Our worlds were turned upside-down.

Meanwhile, some of the most profound losses have been inside of us. 2020 shook us to the core, and asked us to dig deep. We remembered this year how little control we have over things. Many of us grappled with anxiety, depression, loneliness, uncertainty, and trauma.

And yet in the rubble, we have also found the gold.

Through being lost and found, many of us are finding out what really matters. We have been reminded that we are social creatures and that we are our own best company. We realize how much we need one another; that we are stronger together and it takes a village to heal. In our endless days of stillness and solitude, we have found profound inner fortitude.

At-home togetherness has brought families closer and shifted their priorities. Many people have lost their commutes and regained their footing. Some have lost their footing and discovered new possibilities. Those who are safe at home can hear their soul’s voice again, and finding it may feel both familiar and unfamiliar...like a long-lost friend. Many of us feel the call toward reinvention but have been stuck behind the longest yellow light ever.

Most of us are now ready to bravely name what structures and systems are outdated and ready to be thrown into the fire. We are letting go of the paradigm that we aren’t enough, and finding that we don’t have to prove ourselves anymore.

We have also found our limits this year. We are speaking up and out against racial and economic injustice. We are navigating our own choices around what feels safe for ourselves and our families. We are saying ENOUGH when it’s enough and asking for support when it’s too much. We are learning to fine-tune our razor-sharp sense of discernment--of what is True and what is Just and what is not.

The new year is an opportunity to reflect on and find meaning in all the heaviness and the discoveries. To collect ourselves. To assess. To realign in these new circumstances. To cry. To take inventory. To look at the bird’s eye view AND what is present right now in our hearts. To give gratitude. To cherish this moment. To integrate and hold tight the experiences that are meant to soak in deep and come with us. To decide who we want to be moving forward. To decide what’s not meant to come with us. To name new dreams, if they are ready to be named—and bury old ones, if they are ready to be let go.

Most of us have not had a moment to breathe and take stock. What are the casualties? What wounds need tending? How am I feeling? What do I need? Who am I now?

Crossing the bridge into a new year is not going to flip a switch, but it can offer us an intermission to review, refuel, and realign.

By unfolding the layers of this year and making space for all our complex feelings that are tucked away, I hope you will walk into 2021 feeling lighter, stronger, richer, and more purposeful.

In our first meditative reflection practice, I will guide you through a journey to remember and process the magnitude of this year. It’s pretty powerful, so grab your cozy sweater and your journal, and I’ll meet you there.

When you're finished, you can proceed to the next section for the guided meditation. >>